Some of you have heard I'm changing my Facebook account. And yes, I'm adding the blog to the agenda of the major clean-up. So a New Blog will be setup by the End 2013.
So here's what I posted in my Facebook. Because I want to make this very clear for people who don't really understand the utter mess that I've been through that really warrants this major update.
'Hey all, I just want to clear up the air a bit before I leave for church on the main reasons why that I'm changing accounts and pinning this on top of my timeline.
When I said that I'm closing and shifting most of my things to my new main, I implore you to my RL and personal friends out there please don't do a mass exodus from here and not adding me there, I don't see a reason why. I open this post to both Friends and Friends of friends for a reason.
I just feel to leave this account because of all the unwanted stuff which really I don't have time to commit to clearing. Hey, it's like my Hotmail, in a nutshell, where I am also ditching it because of 8000+ unread emails. And LOL wow, that is a lot.
I might have said this before. Some of you may have experienced me personally that I do have a snappy and somewhat whiny personality, but that is due to the fact of my personal disorder, and I was brought up having gone through a whole tonne of 'ain't-good' stuff that really aggravates the condition a lot. I do have a sense of pride that I really wish to retain a balance of. It pains me a lot to eat so much humble pie for this year that ain't good.
Personally, and on a serious note, one of the major reasons and concerns to migrate my Accounts was to void all the hate comments I made here and received be it here or Whatsapp. Especially true to this year. I really don't want to remember 2013 as a being good year. In fact it has been my fucking worst year ever, beyond any reasonable comprehension with a few depression spells which I never had before prior to 2013. Excuse the language, but really this is currently by far my worst year. The damage has already been done and I'm already extremely angry of what went came and gone for me. But worst of all, I practically don't have ANY place, don't have any avenue or anybody willing enough that allows me to safely let off and vent months of steam accumulated without consequences.
We haven't even gone to September yet and now I just want to quickly fucking finish off 2013 and start 2014 cleared of any doubts and despair that was inflicted on me this year.
So come 2014, I want to start everything fresh, with a New Revamped Facebook Account up and running (http://facebook.com/MusicHaven1990) that will be totally void of all the bad stuff that I have said since I setup this one in 2007. For that I need your help and to even help me reach out those who have blocked me for one reason of another. And help me stay happy for 2014. I hope this clarify things.
Have a great afternoon everyone.'
So in the meantime, add my new main in. Link above.
Another falling out... I really don't understand. Seriously, I don't. I'm through with all this....Now I don't even feel like sharing my latest Understanding of the CCC episodes to YouTube now. I have been deliberating since late Wednesday Night, didn't want to do it but I'm gonna come clean yet again right now. - I was a fool to follow down the path of a musician which has led me nowhere after almost 20 years experience and nobody save a very small few knows or cares of how freaking much I've been through. - I was a fool to have joined my ministry and still have been a practice target after all these years. - I was a fool to have gone to Ping Yi Secondary rather than Maris Stella High (Secondary) after they accepted my appeal after PSLE, ended up being a fucking punching bag despite futile efforts by the staff of the school to put a stop to all this. - I was a fool to do more than a fair share of my workload in National Service while the most of my other colleagues does nothing. - I was a fool to even have an older brother treating me as a punching bag. - And the worst of it all, I was a fool to even have been born suffering much with a Mental Problem. and above all, nobody fucking gives a shit. Honestly, this is the thanks I get? What in heavens name did I ever do to deserve this....I'm tired man... real tired and ultimately, I've been a fool for the whole 23+ years of my existence that's not entirely my fault. Signing out, GM Paul
Well, I am contemplating whether to upgrade my Desktop PC again because the main thing that's pulling me back is the Mechanical Drive. An SSD would be nice but there's more which I'll share later on.
Now I went back to the VRZone forums to see whether I can get a decent SSD at these rates:
100 bucks for ~ 120GB models
200 bucks for ~250GB ones.
Now Ordway who dealt me the PNY GTX 680 has offered me these options he is trying to clear out so I'm contemplating which one is great for the money. I've known Ordway, I dealt the GTX 680 and he's pretty much no frills, no disappoint, damn on the ball seller who has the support of many a fellow forum member.
OK! Here's what he has and which should I pick? (Copy and pasted directly from his PM to me)
Adata 128GB SX900 128GB - $110 (Local with 2 years warranty left) Vertex 4 128GB - $100 (non local) Crucial Micron C300 128GB - $95 (non local) Intel 520 120GB - Top Tier SSD with 4 years + warranty left - $130 Corsair GT 240GB - $220 (Local with 2 years warranty left)
Pretty neat selection eh? Which one you think I should get?
OK. Next bit, I'm thinking whether I should swap out my GTX 680 for Ordway's (Last) Pair of MSI Power Edition GTX 670s. It comes with the Twin Frozr IV cooling so well loved. If I consider it, it'll be my 2nd and 3rd Cards from MSI. I believe the top-up would be around 300+. So I wonder whether it's worth the price.
It's always this time again every year whereby a group of seniors earn promotions within the Military. Let me give my quick 2 cent views about that.
While it's a time of praise and glory for our fellow seniors which is you know, all good in all honesty, don't get me wrong. Some may deserve it, well, some may not. I can't judge for that matter. In any case, good for you if you do get promoted.
Then again however, there's always a small bunch of people the SAF always forgets. You always forget the kids, kids who also should share in some of the joy and be recognized for their contributions on Promo Day.
I'm not exactly sure whether I said it before, so I'll say it now: I do stand by those youngsters who contribute more than a fair share of their keep even within the stint of 2 years. Be it the normal greenie from the infantry or even the clerks since all of them are your foundations of the military; not just "Oh, newbie, fresh meat for the grinder."
And hey, even among these new ones, you might even some that would eventually stand out to have probably performed way better than the current batch that just got promoted.
I dunno.... your thoughts maybe? Hmm? Well, Yup.
Cheerio. My quick thoughts since the topic gets pretty wide and / or dry and I don't know that much about it although I did serve my 2 years of NS, doing more than my fair share.
"Listen to my story. This may be our last chance"
- Tidus
Now this is another serious post. Now many have known the extent of my suffering that I have been going through for the entire 23 years of my life. Before anyone of you continues to be cold towards me in any wave shape or form, I want everyone to note.
I don't want to make this sound like that I want sympathy from you. I never want to act as if that I am attempting to manipulate you people. I never want to act as if I'm creeping you out. I'm just struggling to implore you all, just hear me out;
I just want you to know and think better and less ill of me because seriously speaking, I have enough of all this.
And I tell you guys all nothing but the truth.
*About Aspergers Syndrone and struggling with it - If you want to explore what it is, Google or Wikipedia is your friend.
Now till now, I still don't understand the extent of how bad this spectrum of Autism can be. And I don't understand of what will result from this.Therefore, any bad behavior and thinking that is unintended from me personally, I really do apologize sincerely and meaningfully. I bear no ill will towards others unless with valid and obvious reasons. However that shouldn't give a reason, again unless valid, to hold ill will or treat me badly against me either.
I only heard about it when I started paying visits to psychiatrists to try and get around that.
Till now, I've been viewing this as a curse and I bore this heavy burden and carried this Cross for a long time. People been telling me not to, but I just don't understand how I should view this. Time after time every now and again, I've been praying in Church to find such answers. God's plan for me.... but I'm struggling to accept it, for the 12 years when I first was told of such a condition.
I may not talk much but I tend to be shy when it comes to speaking up and interact with friends. Basically in truth, I find it hard at times to keep my circle of friends and I struggle with it often. And bad things that happened, it hit me extremely hard, whether my fault or when I was the victim.
And many stories which I'm sharing have led me to be extremely wary of people and easily affected and traumatized by many things which unintentionally puts people off. It's by experiences in the past that led me to this stage of difficulty of maintaining and establishing friendship with others, and obviously a lack of a girlfriend in my entire 23 years of living.
*My Stories.
In truth, 23 years ago, the story of me almost ended before it even began. I was brought into the world prematurely. And learnt from my parents that I spent like a month and a half in an incubator at Critical Condition. So in short, I nearly almost didn't exist, much to my mum's initial fears.
And as being small and frail as a result of premature birth when I first started life, people take advantage of me, resulting to victim of countless bullying incidents and assaults. And many of these incidents even after 20 years I can still remember lots of my bad stories about me and cause huge traumas of what I think of people.
Days in Primary and Secondary school weren't exactly a bed of roses. In fact, these chapters hold a very big majority of my haunting memories that plague me till now. Already on board a school bus, this already started. And one of them, who eventually became a member of Genesis II Choir, was a potentially tall (for his age) and an intimidating presence on board. And things like stealing pencil cases, spoiling zips, taking my water flasks were one end of the spectrum. How about physical force at the end of the spectrum? Bullies were super super common and taking advantage of me was a super regular affair till my Dad have to step in and address the classes several times to suppress all this. This had little effect still however.
At the same time, I was subject of even more in my Electone Courses. I purely left the course because I encountered such dicks there under Mr Yeo.
At Secondary School, this gets more apparent. Dad to closely monitor this, joined the Ping Yi Secondary Parent support Group. Eventually he rose to the Group's Vice-Chair and always gets in contact with members of the staff.
The Secondary Three Camp is the one that I definitely cannot forget. This is one such instance whereby bullying went to the extreme levels that caused not only caused me physical injuries like burns (one of them I still bear as a scar). This escalated to a police case which was inconclusive and we couldn't find the suspects. I wasn't the only one beaten up by a group of gangsters in camp. It resulted me with physical injuries, mental injury and property injury. I was so scared of people as a result from things like this. I wanted to quickly get the hell away from school but I knew that it was impossible and this traumatized me really heavily and was left still taking several beatings till I graduated.
The thing about all these bullying crap, once they do it, they never dare to admit and in turn not stop doing it till heavy intervention is needed.
However, this have made me having phobia of camps and large places without personal company which I nearly don't have. I avoided band camps or any sort of camps after that. My instructor understood and acknowledged my fears and was absolutely fine with me to at least attend daily programs planned out without staying the nights. However, Confirmation Camp back in Our Lady of Perpetual Succour Church was also compulsory. You all may think this is a big joke but that's the truth. Even National Service I was already extremely paranoid just in case anything happens to me.
Although Life in the National Service was generally good as a clerk (if nothing to do for me that is), some people are generally too much. There was like one ME2 like out of the blue like report me to Chief Clerk of some shit for nothing. Eh, I just arrived in the unit, and you wanna scare me away? I never even spoke to you and was like damn angry. And later, when he left (and then his good friend followed who also has suspicions of us clerks), in truth I was kinda glad. I shall not name names as I don't want to tarnish the unit's reputation. Reason being it was the only time and organization outside of choir whereby people and seniors really took care of me after they see me working extra hard there and earning my keep.
Of course, you all must have heard of me unable to get through NAFA and Yong Siew Toh, one of those horrors I can't strike out. 5 months for 2 auditions and it has been a freaking roller coaster ride. Combined with the stress and the pressure to do well, this hasn't gone well. And I'm still struggling to come to acceptance of really what is the actual plan that God has schemed for me. And all these recent pileups has made me feel extremely Emo for a time recently.
I want to clear this up if anything that makes me have a emo and short fuse lately.
*My Strengths
When it comes to strengths, my pure strengths as many of you may know, is my mastery on the piano. Plain and simple. It's because of God's will and Mum's love for me especially when I was born that kept me going and convinced me to join the Genesis II Choir as a musician. A lot more so with the skill I have for 2 decades now. For 6 years I've been in this ministry though this wasn't the first ministry I joined in Holy Family Church, the first being the Altar Servers from 1998 to 2001. *My Message to my Friends.
In all, I just have one last thing to say. My friends, please do not ever leave me again. I hardly have people to talk or hang out that I can share my problems with. The 'Curse' that I viewed as an unintended weakness and 'blessing' crafted by God.
Another serious post today. And as many of you know that I didn't get accepted to NAFA. And after 2 whole auditions and 5 months, I just can't and will not accept it. It's not worth spending months after months practicing just getting turned down audition after audition.
You know I'm still a bit sore since last week. Moreover my parents are know literally forcing me to get somewhere but so far for the last 10 months I didn't get a single job offer.
Now I'm literally pressured. NAFA or Yong Siew Toh if you are reading this, please do so with utmost seriousness. I need to by hook and by crook get into one of those institutes. If that means getting a new freshman you have accepted off the list, then do it. I can't be lying around any longer.
Either that or I die. Which you pick? Fulfill my destiny.
Hey, a serious post that I want to follow up further after Derick Shared about NSF Clerks.
Now Combatants, don't you dare laugh and hear me out, people who weren't in my shoes as a clerk. My office is such that I have a tonne of ME3s and ME2s all around the place going in and out. Having worked as a clerk and survived I can safely share with you my story.
Yes, people do tell me:
'WAH, PES E lar, so lucky!!!!!'
Ha, don't just assume. Hell, later I realized but when you're solely relied on most of the work in the entire unit, I can safely say:
'This shit stinks.... a lot.'
Let me tell you a matter-of-factly. Day after day, when you report to your superiors (e.g your boss / CO, Chief clerk, Sergeant Majors), you're under constant scrutiny under the watchful eyes of these people and many others higher ranked than you. It holds especially true at a HQ level, because you have a tonne of Sergeant Majors, COs from other units you don't know, high ranking personnel coming in and out of the office. If you're an infantry man, you always have a chance to like do some R & R, I mean real solid R & R.
So don't assume:
"This is how the clerks work; eh they got nothing to do, everyday eat and sleep you know." Now let me prove to you that you are so darn wrong.
Now there's bound to have people and regulars that always feel (how to say...) very dulan with clerks. And I said earlier you're in constant scrutiny; but if you do your fair share of work, many are bound to like you for what you do but there are some exceptions.
I seriously have no idea why you should ever have issues with clerks. There was like one ME 2 that appears to want to pick a fight with me despite me not bearing any ill feelings to him. Hell, I never even talk with him then he just lagi reports me to chief clerk. Both Myself and Chief Clerk was like.... WTF? She knows that I just arrived and I don't even know nuts about the personnel here.
C'mon douche bag. I just arrived to this unit and I have not done anything to offend you. Yet you straightaway from the get-go have issues with me.' And after he left the unit, I was so flipping glad. You think that promoted from an ME1 to ME2 means that you can act very big is it? I don't see why such a scumbag still exists one way or another.
Come on, let me tell you this right here and right now.
Everybody here has a responsibility, even the clerks do, the non-chao keng ones la obviously. And in sometimes a 'black sheep' will be targeted as the actual beast of burden. Such people or (let me use this term yet again:) The Ultimate Unsung Heroes in every unit are your building blocks of your day to day operations throughout their existence.
In truth, I was one of those poor black sheep. Transport Matters, general administrative matters, rostering for 2 National Day Parades and other projects / events, and even being the personal assistant of the regimental Sergeant Major at the unit there. Most times I'm like the only one in the office, on time and on target, from Bedok to Yishun. I worked day after day, rain or shine; falling sick I still worked because I couldn't afford to let go of my already piled on duties due to the massive job scope I was already involved in.
Now you explain to me; in view of all this, how do you expect me to stay at home even while I'm sick? HOW CAN?! Even there was one time somebody needed some important stuff and I had to literally rush back to camp like 30 clicks north from the clinic despite the fact that I was under medical leave, only then I was able to rest.
2-way cab man, oh shit....the damage to my wallet within a few hours.
I prayed real hard in and out of Church during these two years that I'll make it out alive and not explode at the officers and the SMs because I was suffering a lot, and growing angry. However I literally did explode once while during a tonne of shit, telling off every single one in the office to leave me be, including CO and RSM because I was already undergoing a tonne of stress, causing an emotional breakdown. Well, they did, and I earned myself some respite and much needed time to calm myself down. To step up a notch, I placed a sign to keep my disturbances to a minimal, on my computer. Some did apologize to me, but that wasn't enough to satisfy me for all the stuff that I did.
My honest truth is that I did more than my fair share, earned more than enough of my keep but almost nobody among my colleagues save a few was sharing the same suffering as I did. And as if being the most heavily relied on isn't enough that my absence would almost literally mean the collapse of my unit, being paid a measly minute $550 bucks for doing a HQ's worth of Jobs isn't justified. I know that some people earn money staying at home, taking long term MCs; people saying and noticing some of my colleagues just go on a hiatus leaving a few poor things to do their work. And even after I left, many don't really thank me for all this stuff that literally kept the office running.
You infantry man have those $3,000 Cash Bonus Cycles. You have 3 Cycles, the PES E Clerks only have 1.
So don't you dare laugh, Combatants. Even clerks have been at the receiving end of the nastiest of all things.
It's been a while since I last blogged. Had a good day but ended with some really fucked up shit that really spoil it. Guys from NAFA, you're all gonna hear from me. And I'll assure you that I'll make things really unpleasant for you till accept me to the institute.
OK! The good for the week: Genesian II Road Trip with Friends. Just going to Johor Bahru and hanging at AEON is awesome where we did check out Tian Lai Restaurant. And miraculously we located and found the place driving blind. Night before I also watched the Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring - Live to Projection performed by the Metropolitan Festival Orchestra. Photoes to follow in the next post.
NOW the bad shit that really spoiled my day: NAFA. Though I was more prepared for this. I really feel that 5 months worth of auditions really isn't worth the pain I've gone through. So angry I was that I immediately ripped and crushed the NAFA rejection letter. All this crap, were they all in vain?!
Until acceptance to NAFA I am, my judgement that you must respect. I'm still sore about it and I refuse to accept this.
You all are gonna hear it from me, right here.
Now buckle up ladies, this ride is just beginning.
Hey there, I'm writing to really seek assistance for a Job. Though I'm more versed into Music, but will settle for desk job if necessary.
The post is broken into 2 sections: My Job Requirements and my Resume.
1. JOB REQUIREMENTS
Job Scope: Office; Clerical / Administrative
Availability: Now to Mid July, longer if Auditions didn't go through.
Type: Part Time, with option to go full time if Auditions didn't go through.
Venue: Preferbly East side of Singapore.
Work Schedules: 5-day work week, Because I'm required for commitments on Weekends in Church where my presence is often critical at times.
Salary: Low 4-figure monthly Salary with room for gradual increment if need to go full time.
2. RESUME
EDUCATION / QUALIFICATIONS
Secondary School Education: Ping Yi Secondary School GCE 'O' Level Score:L1R5: 17 L1R4: 11 CCA Grade: A Diploma in Music and Audio Technology (2007 – 2010) Singapore Polytechnic
Licentiate of the Royal Schools in Music (LRSM) (2009)
Associated Board in Royal Schools in Music (ABRSM)
Piano Recital
Licentiate (LTCL) Diploma (2005)
Trinity College London
Piano Recital PAID EXPERIENCENational Serviceman – Admin Support Assistant (2010-2012)
Handled E-Mails
Indention of Transport
Maintaining Medical Leave Records for unit
Answered Phone Calls with regards to Transport indention.
Filing of important documents
Second Year Internship at Temasek Secondary School (2009)
Relief Teaching (Music)
Technical Support Staff
Musician for Engagements
Accompanist for Saxophone Examination (ABRSM Grade 8) (SEP 2012)
Accompanist for Saxophone Examination (SAF Internal, Non-Paid) (2011)
Accompanist / Musician for Gigs (2010 - Present)
Musician for Weddings via Church Choir (Various: 2008 - Present)
ACHIEVEMENTS
Ossia Music School Competition (2010)
Runner Up – Open Category Marching Band Singapore Youth Festival Central Judging for Marching Bands : GOLD (2004)
Selected to perform for National Day Parade (2005)
Singapore Youth Festival Central Judging for Marching Bands : GOLD (2006)
PAST / PRESENT ORGANISATIONS
Church Choir (2007 – Present) Genesis 2 Choir, Church of the Holy Family
Music Committee, Resident Musician
Military Band (2003 – 2006)
Ping Yi Secondary School Tuba Section Leader (2006), Administrator (2005-2006) Mathematics Society (2000 – 2001)
Maris Stella High School (Primary) Member
COMPUTER SKILLS
Software:
Open Office, Microsoft Office (Excel, Word, PowerPoint)
This is a real serious blog post and this shit ain't funny at all.
Now those who didn't know, I earlier attempted one of the Auditions from Yong Siew Toh Conservatoire of Music which didn't go well. A lot of this is attributed to so many external factors.
Now in the process of recuperating for the next auditions in Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts for the Bachelors of Music. You know what is really going through my mind right now? I tell you to have to spend so much time preparing and so much pain for just a small time is simply not fucking worth it. It's so fucking aggravating that this shit ain't funny anymore. Fuck this shit.... seriously....
Personally, I enjoy much passion playing on the piano if it weren't for any sort of competition or pressure I'm facing. I enjoy playing piano as a hobby, for leisure, for general entertainment like concerts and plays, and especially enjoy playing for videos on YouTube which has been picking views as of late. However, I fucking hate the pressure if I have to face stiff competition like exams and such, including auditions.
The entire downhill started when one of my family members on Dad's Side passed away in February. Furthermore it's a period where I really can't afford anytime to set aside because I lost so much practice time. And you know what was on my mind? I wanted to tell them: "if my career and everything I have done for the YST Auditions goes down in shambles, you all answer to me." I wanted to set more time on the piano and some time with friends and at least go through this once. As a result, I lost all of this shit instead, didn't get through the auditions and I have to go through a second audition. Makes me feel so fucking upset and angry at all this. I prayed, I really prayed really hard not to let any of my anger loose at my parents who insisted left right and center that I attend the wakes and the funeral.
Seriously, all this pain really isn't worth it. Because my career is really hanging in a balance and having to go through another audition, I have practiced till the point that I really don't feel like doing this anymore. I really wanted to grab the degree spots but having experienced all this shit really demotivate me to work at all this. I'm tired man, I'm real real tired but physically and mentally.
Ben insisted to me to grab a course totally outside of what I learnt. Hell, how to you tell me?! I have to do another Diploma Course again which is totally outside of the question. All I've done is music, so I'm sticking to it. But at all this time I really regretted taking the path of a musician because it has lead me to nowhere. Still whenever possible, I wouldn't want to stray anywhere outside of the music world.
Here's where I'm really starting to cry at this point:
- I'm stuck with a Music Diploma
- I lost 1 audition at YST
- And if I fail this one, what am I to do??
- I can't find work elsewhere. No stable income, no money.
- Lacking available time to meet friends.
- And many times Bo Jio.
- Bloody important for future: Still no Catholic GF.
- Your unsung hero has done so many things in the past (SAF Band, Ping Yi Military Band) but I'm not recognized adequately.
Now this crap is aggravating is it not? Having to go through this makes me want to break down emotionally. Now what the hell am I gonna do if NAFA fails to give me a spot in the Degree, and till now I haven't heard from them which day and time is my Auditions.
Now earlier last week, I gave a preview on my new Laptop Aftershock X11 that I just received from the Good folks at Aftershock PC. These guys are the only ones that operate a custom laptop shop in Singapore. Now the review will be based on the many components and also their showroom and service. The Aftershock X11 is based on Clevo's W110ER barebone, the smallest laptop with a beefy Graphics card. It's very very similar to the Clevo W110ER that Elric Phares of Tech of Tomorrow got from AVA Direct. Cost generally doesn't matter because I got this laptop for free then I upgraded my parts. Would like to thank the Wee Brothers for conducting the giveaway!
Aftershock X11 / Clevo W110ER 11.6 Incher compared to the X17 / Clevo P370SM, the flagship 17'
This is taken at the showroom in FUNAN
Now before I carry on, the laptop Specs are as follows:
Intel Core i7 3630QM (2.1GHz, 3.1 GHz Turboboost)
8GB RAM at 1600MHz
250 GB Samsung 840 Solid State Drive.
2GB DDR3 nVidia GeForce GT 650M (835MHz Core Clock; Boosts to 950 at load, 900 MHz Memory. 384 CUDA Cores) - 314.07 Driver
Diamond IC Cooler.
Other Accessories that it goes with:
90W Power Brick
Windows 7 Home Premium 64-bit Installation Disc
Clevo W110ER Utility Disc
LG Pouch for the Laptop.
There are not so much add-ons when it comes to accessories. However, whatever that is required is already provided and more or less already installed, including the Laptop utilities and the GT 650M GeForce Drivers. They should be however updated as soon as more updated versions are available.
Keyboard: The letters on each key are standard size and the keys themselves are however slightly smaller than standard (but not by much). It does take some getting used to but with practice, you can be pretty efficient with the keyboard without too much of a problem. The Function Key above the right arrow key is IMO, the best ideal location since it doesn't have a dedicated Page Up and Down Key. Despite the keyboard having some limitations, it is fully functional and the chiclet feel of the keyboard feels relatively easy to transition from a slightly larger keyboard of a similar layout. You can use an external keyboard, but the current layout is enough for the task at hand. 8/10.
Sound: Surprisingly, the speakers provide A LOT for such a small baby. May be on the soft side, I understand. However, nonetheless the integrated speakers work well and provides more than adequate sound quality. It even does give out slight bass there as well. Score HAS to be high considering the form factor. 9/10. Nice!
Heat: Even with the Diamond IC cooler, it does give out a fair amount of heat. It gets warm at times even at idling. Then again, it's the drawbacks of a form factor. As long as you have something to cool it down, then it should be fine. Still, I'm thankful for the Diamond IC Thermal Compound. 7/10.
Noise: It is completely silent at idling, seriously. You can hardly hear anything at all when the laptop is idling. A lot more so since I'm using an SSD in place of a Normal Hard Drive, so it does keep the noise level further down due to the lack of moving parts inside it. It does kick up a bit during loads but well within the acceptable range. 8.5/10.
Touchpad: Again, considering the form factor-wise, the touchpad is more than adequate for your needs. The touchpad is responsive and you gotta love the nice clicky sound. If you're gaming though, you would probably use an external mouse anyway. Still it does feel alright, and not sticky and problematic. Ugh! Lenovo Y500, that touchpad was uber pain in the butt. 8/10.
Performance: Most laptops of such size will operate on Low Voltage CPUs. However, the Core i7 3630QM is a full-fledged 45W Quad-core/8-Threaded CPU, with an option of going up to a 55W 3840QM or the 3940XM. The GT 650M DDR3 chip is essentially an OVERCLOCKED Desktop DDR3 GT 640 and it trades blows with the GTX 560M, the GPU that is extremely close in comparison in terms of performance. Trivia: there are rumors of a slightly under clocked version of the 650M and will be rebadged as the GT 740M.
That said, this baby godzilla doesn't compromise power at all, no sir, not a bit. It was even able to take some of the latest games like Bioshock Infinite, Battlefield 3 and Diablo 3 in completely maxed out settings at playable levels. Continuous driver updates will make the GPU handle that even better overtime. Also, having an SSD does greatly help in Application performance. The Samsung 840 Write Speed is bottlenecked by the TLC Memory Flash it uses, but you'll still get an obvious boost over a normal hard drive at a more mainstream cost, so can't really complain. For all this hardware in a laptop smaller than the size of an A4 Sheet of paper or 2 of my hands, thoroughly deserves a 10/10 score. Benchmarks to follow.
I ran these games at the native resolution unless stated. Videos to follow. And this is what it can do at playable settings:
StarCraft II Heart of the Swarm - Ultra
Battlefield 3 - Ultra on 1366 x 768, Medium at Full HD
Borderlands 2 - Ultra on 1366 x 768, Medium at Full HD
Bioshock Infinite - Ultra at 1366 x 768
Torchlight 2 - Ultra
Crysis 3 - High with 4x AF, AA Disabled.
Dungeons and Dragons: Neverwinter - Medium High at Full HD
Samsung 840 (Non-Pro SSD Benched)
Aftershock X11 / Clevo W110ER Overview
Dungeons and Dragons: Neverwinter, 1080p Gameplay: Medium High
Bioshock Infinite at 1366 x 768: Ultra Settings
Crysis 3 Gameplay: 1366 x 768, Low to High Details 4x AF, No AA
Display: Although the Clevo W110ER comes with by default a Glossy Screen, AFTERSHOCK PC's X11 default screen is matte, so less glare, especially when you're outside. It's small (which marks scores a little bit) and takes getting used to. But what impressed me though was the impressive density of 135 DPI which beats the density of much larger screens. 8/10.
Connectivity: The Aftershock X11 comes with decent connectivity. VGA, HDMI, 2 USB 3.0 Ports, 1 USB 2.0 Port, a Kensington Lock and a Card Reader. It doesn't have an Optical Disc Bay. Understandable, since the laptop is small and you have to cramp tonnes of already high-end hardware in it. Then again, this day and age, CDs are the thing of the past. And if you need to use a disc, just grab an external drive. They're cheap. 8/10.
Portability: Small and Light, Nuff' Said. 11.6 Inch and at 1.75 Kilos / 4 Pounds makes it lighter and more compact than most mainstream laptops. Despite other lighter laptops lighter than this, it's great as a second rig or main porta-rig. Rightly so, if you relocate from place to place like I often do from Bedroom to downstairs' living room where I can relax and work on a couch with a glass of Ice Lemon Tea. 9/10.
By the way, this is how tiny the Clevo W110ER Aftershock X11 compares to the following 2 Laptops:
- Acer Aspire 5742G, Core i7 2630QM, 6GB RAM, 1GB GT 540M, 14.1 Inch (Dad's Laptop).
- Aftershock Titan with Twin GTX 680M in SLI. (Funan Showroom)
Price: I can't really rate how expensive the laptop could have been. But what I do know is that the recommended configuration of the Aftershock X11 will cost around $1750 bucks. Not really for the meek of wallet especially due to the SSD which jacks the price a bit, but it's still nonetheless cheaper than the closest competitors Dell Alienware's M14 even without an SSD and Razer's whopping expensive blade. The Base Config comes at around $1170, but it comes with pretty much everything that you need for a pretty decent gaming experience. So no rating for price.
Ease of Upgrades: Maintenance and access to the system's components for further upgrades is absolute tool-less since there are no screws that hold in place. The Battery release catches also loosens the base cover, allowing you to open it and reveal the sick hardware from within. Majority of the components save the GPU can be swapped out and you can ask Joe and Marcus Wee to do it for you. With that sort of ease of opening the chassis, cleaning on the fly is easy with your can of compressed air on hand. That said however, just be careful not to open it too much with force or the clips that secure the panel to the laptop might fail on you.
The Aftershock X11 / Clevo W110ER Setup in my living room.
If that's not enough, here's my 2nd Mode in my Bedroom.
Hartke KM60 Keyboard Amplifier, DIY Laptop cooler, Armageddon Aquila X-1 Mouse
And SteelSeries QCK Black MINI Mousepad.
SUMMARY:
As with Aftershock X11's slogan, this machine is undoubtedly TINY but MIGHTY. Basically a netbook on steroids. It's a gaming laptop mind you and you'll rarely find hardware like this in a tiny package. The laptop which used to fulfill this role was the long obsolete 2-kilo Alienware M11X with a GT 540M. Since it's pretty much in the tomb, the X11 has no real rivals when it comes to a high-end gaming system in a a lot more compelling portability as a LAN party system. The closest rival to that would be the current M14, more pricy and heavier, with even the base model priced more than a decked out X11. Even the fully decked out M14 doesn't even have a Dedicated SSD storage and NO USB 3.0 unless you get all this customed.
You'll have to content with heat emissions as most Clevo W110ER models are notorious for and also sacrifice the Optical Drive bay. But as long as you maintain every now and again, gamers will always be assured that in such a form factor like this, you're never going to run out of power.
In all, it's safe to say that the Aftershock X11 is a great baseline Laptop for a big number of purposes, especially if you want something smaller to take with you everywhere.
PROS: Performance within Lightweight and compact size. Adequate Mainstream SSD which cuts down laptop noise in general. No real competitors.
CONS: Not so ideal screen quality despite being matte, Heat Emissions. No internal Optical Drive (unless using external).
Heya all! Well, these few months have been rather mixed and God has planned out things for me in a weird way. Well, it has been some trying times for me. But here are some of the updates. 1. ) The Vatican has elected a New Pope! The globe has something to rejoice after Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio was elected as a new Leader of the Catholic Church after Pope Benedict XVI's shock resignation at the end of February. Msgr Bergoglio has chosen the name Francis after the great Saint Francis of Assisi. He's the very first Pope originated from the Latin America, even outside of Europe and the Southern Hemisphere of the Earth! He was recently elected after a Conclave Election following the past couple days. That didn't take long. 2.) Singapore Archbishop Ordinated!
Catholics and Non-Catholics alike should also rejoice for the ordination of the Archbishop Co-adjutor Monsignor William Goh. He received his episcopal Consecration on 22nd February 2013 at the Singapore Expo. Genesis II Choir was honored to celebrate an event by Singing at the reception the next day! Below is the photograph of a fraction of the group alongside Msgr William Goh in the Straits Times on Sunday 23rd February. Also, Rev. Donatien, Holy Family Church's Spiritual Director, happened to join and sing with us as well. He was practically with the choir the entire day, including driving fellow Genesians back to Holy Family Church, celebrating our usual mass that evening and joining us YET again for choir prac afterwards.
Genesis II Choir with Msgr William Goh (Left to Right) Back: Paul Anthony (Myself; Musician), Joanna Ortega (Conductor), Gabriel Ho, Duane Ang, Annabel Chang, Bryan David, Bryan Chang, Celestine Yeo, Rev. Donatien Davaine, Matthew Wong, Veronica Sng Front: Nicole Verghese, Shu Ying Grace, Msgr William Goh, Sandrine Yap, Vanessa Natalie, Adeline Ng, Juliana Chia
3.) Preview: AFTERSHOCK PC's AFTERSHOCK X11 Well my ASUS K42Jr or actually X42J has finally died down on me after the Motherboard failed because of the Graphics Core that blown itself out. Haven't find the time to repair and I didn't have money to replace. But fate intervened and Aftershock PC has randomly picked me as the winner of the X11 after their Titan has won them the Digital Life Editor's Choice for Gaming Laptop!
I'm heading down to their showroom on Monday to collect that baby and a photo-shoot. Just a quick summary on its specs with S$511 spent on Upgrades. Ivy Bridge Core i5 3210 --> i7 3630QM Stock Cooler --> Diamond IC Thermal Compound 8 GB SODIMM Memory at Dual Channel 1600 MHz 2GB DDR3 nVidia GeForce GT 650M (Chip: 384 CUDA Cores. Clocks of Core: 835 MHz with 950 Boost, Memory: 900 MHz) 11.6' 1366 x 768 500GB Hitachi 2.5' HDD --> 250GB Samsung 840 SSD 1.3 MP Webcam Weight: 1.75 Kilos (4 pounds) Connectivity PortsFront: Card Reader Left: LAN, VGA, HDMI, Headphone Jack, Microphone Jack, 2 USB 3.0 Right: Kensington Lock, 1 USB 2.0, AC Power in. If you search through their product image, the X11 is essentially a rebranded Clevo W110ER. It is pretty much same as Elric Phares' W110ER that he got from AVADirect. Other brands also followed, Origin as the EON-11, Sager, Eurocom, Schenker as the A102 and of course Aftershock as the X11. It's practically the smallest notebook that you can get and possibly game on today's titles Including Crysis 3. Even it you crank the settings way down, within its native resolution it still looks good and still runs well on Medium Settings. We'll see how this Netbook on Steroids fare after I collect it on Monday. It's supposed to match the saying: Tiny But Mighty
Were you there when White Paper was passed on?
Were you there when White Paper was passed on?
Oh Bloody No! Often they want to make us Tremble, Tremble, Tremble....
Were you there when White Paper was passed on?
Were you there when C-O-Es are too HIGH?!
Were you there when C-O-Es are too HIGH?!
Oh Bloody No! Often they want to make us Tremble, Tremble, Tremble....
Were you there when C-O-Es are too HIGH?!
Were you there when PRC's stealing Jobs?
Were you there when PRC's stealing Jobs?
Oh Bloody No! Often they want to make us Tremble, Tremble, Tremble....
Were you there when PRC's stealing Jobs?
Were you there when MRTs Crash and Burn?
Were you there when MRTs Crash and Burn?
Oh Bloody No! Often they want to make us Tremble, Tremble, Tremble....
Were you there when MRTs Crash and Burn?
Were you there when locals must serve NS?
Whereas sons of Pinkies need not serve NS?
Oh Flipping No! They want to see us all to Tremble, Tremble, Tremble....
Were you there when locals must serve NS?
Were you there when our pay is far too low?
Were you there when our pay is far too low?
Where the money Goes?! All of it has gone to the Pinkies, Pinkies, Pinkies...
Were you there when our pay is far too low?
Though I won't make it there at Hong Lim Park!
In Spirit, I'll support guys at Hong Lim Park!
Rise, Singapore! It's time that we go against the Pinkies, Pinkies, Pinkies
Asus and NVidia paired together and held a small little community event in Ibis in Bencoolen Street which is a stone's throw away from Sim Lim Square. I happen to be the lucky one to actually be selected as one of the 100 Gamers invited for this small gathering there. The purpose of this one is for the guys to share and introduce the new Graphics Cards / Video Cards which incorporated the best of Asus and NVidia had to offer.
ASUS were up in arms with their non-reference GPU cooler in the form of the Direct CU II Cooler. The Direct CU II TOP cards are just factory overclocked versions of the card. I've been hearing this a lot especially from the likes of Elric Phares from Tech Of Tomorrow and Linus from Linus Tech Tips and NCIX. Whereas for nVidia, they introduced the Kepler 28nm architecture for their GeForce 600 series of GPUs. This architecture compared to the last generation Fermi Architecture is said to be more power efficient and combines better performance per watt.
To stay on top of their game software-wise, ASUS released their GPU Tweak software which is in a nutshell a combo of an expanded tweaking of MSI Afterburner and Monitoring of GPU-Z. NVidia did their part by allowing GeForce Experience go Open Beta which allows you to get optimal settings for games by factoring your GPU and CPU. It only works with an nVidia GeForce based GPU, not AMD Radeon.
Following Photographs show some of the pictures that I took with my Samsung Galaxy S3.
Outside the TASTE Restaurant at Ibis
As always I always tend to turn up especially early for the every event there is. You might say I'm always kancheong but in truth I always value punctuality rather than getting late.
ASUS's mini ITX PC.
A Build that is perfect for the budget gamer and the space shy people. This packs an i5 3570 non-K processor, 8 Gig RAM, 1TB Hard Drive, a GTX 650 (Direct CU II), and an ITX board. All this is powered by a 520W 80+ Bronze CoolerMaster Power Supply and housed in the CoolerMaster Elite 120 ITX Case. But in truth you could easily power a GTX 660 Ti and a GTX 670 should you see fit. I would have loved to test it but no net connection lol. I did overclock the 650 a tiny bit. Peripharels come in the form of a CM Storm Quickfire TK and a Sentinal Advanced II Mouse and a SteelSeries Diablo III/Asus Mousepad.
The CM Line of products and peripherals which include the CM Storm Keyboards and various mice also from Cooler Master. I already own one of those Keyboards, just the tenkeyless and non-backlit version in the form of the CM Storm Quickfire Rapid. I will definitely recommend you guys to give CoolerMaster's range of keyboards a try if you hadn't done so yet.
Best of Asus, Nvidia and CoolerMaster Build. This is pretty much decked out with an overclocking ready CPU (i5 3570K) although it's best to have an i7 3770K in there for the best, but i5s ain't too shabby. GTX 680, 16GB RAM, OCZ Vector 256GB SSD, P8Z77 Motherboard, AIO Water-cooling 120mm Radiator, what more you want?
Hugo from Taiwan explaining the features of the new 28nm Kepler process from nVidia. He does know his stuff, but I feel a lot better if the speaker can really speak fluent English like how Local Singaporean Teenagers and Youths do. Frankly, I know quite abit too much since I watched plenty of GTX 600 series videos on YouTube when they first rolled out the line of GPUs.
A Close-up shot of the best of Asus Build. You can see the Direct CU II nVidia GTX 680 quite clearly as well as the radiator and the motherboard.
One of the rigs setup there. I gotta tell ya, I was kinda sad about the build. Because you do have an overclocking ready i7 3770K on board, yet you have a really wimpy GT 640 in there. You could have done so much more if you put something like a GTX 660Ti or GTX 670 which is what I would have done. I did try playing BattleField 3 on this rig, and it was kinda struggling badly with textures at Ultra and the rest auto set to Medium. If you want that big performance, take a look at my PNY GTX 680 video here. And did I say my CPU is just an older i5 2500K?
One of the freebies that came with the bag, the NVidia and ASUS Republic of Gamers Shirt, alongside the Intel Extreme Masters shirt I wore that night.
I managed to get this SteelSeries Diablo III / Asus Edition Qck MINI mousepad from Hugo for answering a question there. As you can see, the feel is very similar to my other SteelSeries Qck MINI black that I've been using for a little while now.
